It has, once again, been a long stretch since I have had the ability to make a post on this blog (or any blog for that matter).
The truth is, I have been struggling with some very personal matters that, until now, I have not been emotionally capable of sharing in a public forum.
Remember this post? You do? Oh good. I meant everything I wrote there.
Photo from www.mendyourbrokenheart.com
In December, however, I found out that TallHusband no longer felt the same way. By February he officially asked me for a divorce. A little over a week ago the kids and I moved out of our dream home in the country and back to our quaint, perfectly good house in suburbia. While no official papers have been filed yet, it is the direction we are moving. Custody schedules have already been put into place and are, as far as we can tell, working out just fine. The kids have been troopers and very understanding throughout the entire situation. I watch them carefully and have been keeping a very open line of communication for them to express their feelings and needs.
To be quite honest, I have been astonished by what has transpired. It blindsided me like nothing else in my life ever has. I found a blog that changed my perspective on so many things: Postcards from a Peaceful Divorce. I strive to make this the most peaceful, easy process that it can be. Because TallHusband and I have been together for nearly 15 years and were best friends before we dated, just cutting him out of my life (outside of mother-father courtesies) is darn near impossible. I can not imagine not having my friend. I have lost too many friends in the past. He will not be another one.
The good news is that I am also doing remarkably well. I am seeing a counselor to help me through the emotions and to deal with other outlying issues that I know I need to work on. I’ve also made the decision to go back for my MA degree in the fall. I’m so looking forward to getting started in the program and working my fingers off! Let’s hope that I can find a money tree planted somewhere along that journey!
I promise to get back to blogging now that I am settled in my new (old) house and the kids are finding their places in the routine. Divorce is not something I ever had to deal with in my family, so this is all completely uncharted territory for me. Every day brings new discovery, new emotion, and new … everything.
Here’s to new beginnings from the desk of (a soon-to-be single) mom. Hope you’ll join me on this next leg of my journey.
- Amy
